In 2002 if you would have told me that I would be a stay at home dad, I would have thought you were joking. That year I was voted most likely to succeed in my highschool class. I excelled scholastically, I excelled at sports, I was thoroughly involved in school being class vice-president, president of national honor society, received the schools highest Presedent’s Award, and I was thoroughly involved in extra curricular activities. Looking to the future I thought I would become something far different than what I do now.
The problem with being good at everything, is that I’m not necessarily great at one thing. I’m a decent artist, a decent photographer, decent at multitasking, however I have a hard time narrowing down my concentration to one activity. Around 2007 I attended medical school. The problem with medical school is that you have to devote all your time to one thing. My mind does not work that way. I have to expand my knowledge to a broad variety of things and not just one. So I left school to find myself.
A decade later and I have yet to find myself. I’ve worked as a photographer for many years. I did become fairly successful, and then something big happened. March 30th, 2012 Johanna came into the world. Jolene was helping me with my business as well as working full time as a nurse. Working every weekend as well as taking care of a child kept us busy. Too busy really. I decided to back off from photography business to devote my time to my daughter. That decision meant I would be labeled the inevitable “stay at home dad.”
There’s a bad stigma about being a stay at home dad. Being a stay at home mom has already been frowned upon in recent years. Countless days I’ve had to battle with other’s judgmental opinions, as well as my own preconceptions about it. In today’s society it is becoming the norm to send your children to daycare. Both parents tend to work, while someone else resumes the responsibility of child rearing. Jolene and I did not want that. Luckily we could afford to live on the majority of Jolene’s salary.
Hopefully having me home at all times will somehow benefit Johanna one day. Along with her future brother. Jolene is expecting a boy at the end of September. So my job load will be increased. In the past couple years I’ve started a couple of businesses at home. So I run those businesses while taking care of Johanna. In the inkling hours of the morning, I decide to create another website. This website www.daddysturn.com I wanted to be a voice to other fathers out there. I wanted to create a community for daddies who feel turned away by society. While writing it will also create an avenue where I can vent and express my opinions.
So for those dads out there wondering if you should become a stay at home dad out there, only you and your family can make that decision. I will say, that being a parent is the easiest job out there. I know I will get a lot of flack for that comment, but truly being a parent is easy. It never ends, it take up almost all your time, it’s not always fun, you’ll always wonder if you did the right thing, but in the end it’s still very easy. It’s not rocket science. Not only that, don’t let any woman tell you that you can’t be a stay at home parent and do it correctly. You can. I’ve seen fathers far surpass their mother counterparts in excelling at being a stay at home parent.
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